Hands in the air, rock-a-bye your bear...
Sing along if you know the words...
That song has been stuck in my head for the past...3 days...! The boys love it, and I, well, I don't mind it seeing as it is the only song both the boys can do the actions to. The second they hear the song start they jump to their feet and start doing the actions.
For most kids, like Braeden for example, it is easy to copy the moves (he can even do the La La La's). For Ryley though, he has been practising it for a very long time (try years, not just days). He can almost do all the moves. It makes me so proud to see him up there in front of the TV (they are words you don't hear too often) alongside Braeden dancing and moving together. He absolutely loves it.
I figured something out the other day too. Well, not exactly figured it out. More like acknowledged it instead of ignoring it. I think part of why I get so cross with Ryley when he does his whingy noise is because I am frustrated. Sometimes I just wish he could express what he wants better, play by himself for a little while or not rely on me so much. It's not really him I am cross with so much as it's his disability I am cross with. I also know how incredibly frustrating it is for him sometimes because his body just won't do what he wants it to do.
When he is spending time with me, he expects me to help him with everything, because, well, I always have. So he knows that while I am there he can refuse to walk, go down the slide on his own, go on the trampoline on his own etc. He pretends he can't do things that he can actually do on his own. It is attention seeking stuff.
I know that all he needs is some extra attention, but it is extremely difficult to give him what he wants when I have Braeden wanting attention too.
Sounds simple enough, but the thing is, that Ryley actually gets an enormous amount of attention because I spend most of my time doing basic things for him like PEG feeds, dressing him, nappy changes, getting him a drink etc. But as far as Ryley is concerned, this doesn't count as attention from Mum. But it takes up a lot of my time. And doesn't leave much room for other things by the time I factor in breastfeeds and nappy changes and preparing food for Braeden.
Anyway, I have the solution, and it always works. I spend one on one time with Ryley and David spends one on one time with Braeden. Win win all round.
I spent all of Saturday just hanging with Ryley, well, actually he came shopping with me (which he loves) and he helped me cook. We went up to the Lake and played at the playground and watched people and cars and just chatted.
WELL.
The change in behaviour is unbelievable.
He still clings to me and expects me to do everything for him (today he refused to walk), but he was also happy to just sit and let me read the paper while he watched the dogs playing and Braeden tearing around on his bike.
Aaah...the serenity.
Well, for 15 minutes anyway!!
So I guess, for now, he is happy. While he is happy, I am happy. And Braeden...well he is always happy. He marvels at everything (today he realised that if he looked at the window a certain way it reflected and he could see me..he was so excited).
Two more weeks and school is back.
Not that I am counting or anything.
That song has been stuck in my head for the past...3 days...! The boys love it, and I, well, I don't mind it seeing as it is the only song both the boys can do the actions to. The second they hear the song start they jump to their feet and start doing the actions.
For most kids, like Braeden for example, it is easy to copy the moves (he can even do the La La La's). For Ryley though, he has been practising it for a very long time (try years, not just days). He can almost do all the moves. It makes me so proud to see him up there in front of the TV (they are words you don't hear too often) alongside Braeden dancing and moving together. He absolutely loves it.
I figured something out the other day too. Well, not exactly figured it out. More like acknowledged it instead of ignoring it. I think part of why I get so cross with Ryley when he does his whingy noise is because I am frustrated. Sometimes I just wish he could express what he wants better, play by himself for a little while or not rely on me so much. It's not really him I am cross with so much as it's his disability I am cross with. I also know how incredibly frustrating it is for him sometimes because his body just won't do what he wants it to do.
When he is spending time with me, he expects me to help him with everything, because, well, I always have. So he knows that while I am there he can refuse to walk, go down the slide on his own, go on the trampoline on his own etc. He pretends he can't do things that he can actually do on his own. It is attention seeking stuff.
I know that all he needs is some extra attention, but it is extremely difficult to give him what he wants when I have Braeden wanting attention too.
Sounds simple enough, but the thing is, that Ryley actually gets an enormous amount of attention because I spend most of my time doing basic things for him like PEG feeds, dressing him, nappy changes, getting him a drink etc. But as far as Ryley is concerned, this doesn't count as attention from Mum. But it takes up a lot of my time. And doesn't leave much room for other things by the time I factor in breastfeeds and nappy changes and preparing food for Braeden.
Anyway, I have the solution, and it always works. I spend one on one time with Ryley and David spends one on one time with Braeden. Win win all round.
I spent all of Saturday just hanging with Ryley, well, actually he came shopping with me (which he loves) and he helped me cook. We went up to the Lake and played at the playground and watched people and cars and just chatted.
WELL.
The change in behaviour is unbelievable.
He still clings to me and expects me to do everything for him (today he refused to walk), but he was also happy to just sit and let me read the paper while he watched the dogs playing and Braeden tearing around on his bike.
Aaah...the serenity.
Well, for 15 minutes anyway!!
So I guess, for now, he is happy. While he is happy, I am happy. And Braeden...well he is always happy. He marvels at everything (today he realised that if he looked at the window a certain way it reflected and he could see me..he was so excited).
Two more weeks and school is back.
Not that I am counting or anything.
Ten days until my two go back - not that I'm counting either!!
ReplyDeleteAnna... this is going to sound wierd but - a few WHS moms and I were talking about a recent desperate housewives clip. I dont watch the show regularly but was directed to it because there is a part where one of the women has a dream that her son has special needs and it goes on to talk about how he wants her to do things for him eventhough he can and the feelings she has about that and how she wants him to be self sufficient in case she is no longer there one day.
ReplyDeleteI WAS BAWLING to say the least. You should check it out... if you want a good cry! Ha!
It was aired on 1/3/10 and called "If..."